Last night we talked briefly................he told me he was glad I was back safely, that he had missed me, and that, in the words that make various bodily parts of me clench, shake, moisten, quiver, sink, leap, spin and feel all peculiar, he said...................."hmmmmm, ahhhhhhhh, ohhhhhhhhhh, " as he put me under the metaphorical microscope..............."I think.............we need some time..........I need to use you, for you to feel my control, and this time it is going to be hard, very hard and you will ask me, beg me for it, and thank me when I am done with you".
And from some where deep inside a whispered voice replied "Yes please Sir".
So now I have to wait to see, I am left to ponder without trying to think about it.
No second guessing.
No predictions.
Just pondering
I cannot ask, I cannot cajole, or push or introduce it as a topic for discussion, or whinge or whine.
Nothing
So I wait, until he is ready, until he has thought exactly what he wants, needs to do, until then........................I am allowed to ponder my place, my purpose, my role................no more
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